Debt Free Darling

Juggling life and it’s many twists and turns is not something which has come easy to me. I often find myself wondering if there’s an issue with my internal gearbox. Finding myself stuck in Park, Neutral or Sport, for lack of a better comparison. Bouncing between doing everything at once, and quietly begging my body to cooperate.

When I first imagined this blog, it was simply a pleace to document my journey toward financial freedom, whether anyone ever read it or not. I hoped that by writing things down, I’d build habits that finally stick. It didn’t take long to realise I can’t separate my spending from my wellbeing; the two are so tightly woven that creating a space for both feels not just useful, but necessary.

The past few years have flipped, flopped and spun me around so thoroughly that some days I’m not sure which way is up. At 30, I recieved a diagnosis for Combined Type ADHD, mostly presenting as impulsive and inattentive behaviours – something I’ll share more about in future posts.

That diagnosis started a long process of unlearning. I promised myself I’d step away from the negative self-talk, the self-depreciating humour, and the shame I carried for not meeting impossible standards. I’m learning to treat myself with care, to define my own version of “good”, and to become my own person rather than the daughter, granddaughter, or “good girl” I thought I had to be.

I am not broken, lazy or unmotivated for choosing a path that looks different from the one my family imagined. There is no shame in becoming who you actually are.

NOt everyone around me has welcomed these changes with open arms. I still hear reminders to “rememver where you’re from” or gentle warnings not to “aim too high”. But wanting something different, something chosen by me, isn’t a flaw. It’s growth.

One thing I wish I’d been told, back when I was first referred to the adult ADHD team, is that not everyone will adjust to your growth at the same pace you do.

Which is why I’m starting this series — to explore the link between how I’m growing and how I’m spending, and to build a future that feels both sustainable and truly mine.